It still shocks me that in this age of needing effective communication, people still debate whether copywriters are a necessity.
“I can write. I went to school. I can walk in a semi-upright position. What do I need a writer for?” Well, maybe to show you how not to end a sentence on a preposition, but also to help you not look like a ruh-tard.
Submitted for your approval: Joseph Nedlin, founder of Joka Vodka (named after his call-sign in Vietnam). Joseph decided to write his own press release to promote his new drink. Here is his attempt, word for agonisingly embarrassing word:
“Name: Joseph Nedlin
Subject: sexist American Vodka
Paritotism is sexy to many women and men alike. Joka Vodka gives all its profits to support American Veterans with three high end vodkas. This new vodka has taken over where other vodkas leave off. Its smooth, taste is light and refined and started in Aspen, Colorado. It is available on in Colorado, California and Texas.
American made and sold only in America to the sexist people in the world….”
Copywriters use words to make your case for sales with potential clients. We (the good ones amongst us anyway) can do this effectively because we have a talent with wrangling words. That means we won’t sell your vodka “to the sexist people in the world.”
That’s why you need a copywriter. So you don’t look like a ruh-tard and your potential clients (unless equally mentally challenged from birth) will take you seriously.
Joseph, if you’re reading this (or having someone read this to you), it’s not too late, buddy. You can still fix this. Hire a writer and let her sort this out for you. Please. Or it’s just a waste of good vodka…